Started looking for a mortgage today. So far, it’s not as perfect as I’d have hoped. I haven’t given up hope yet, (it’s only been one day), but I’m feeling a little down.

So, as a back-up, I’m starting to look for rentals, both up here and in FL. I would love to be able to figure out what the “right” answer is to it all. But life just doesn’t do that… so I’m trying to take it one step at a time.

Been depressed the past couple of days. I don’t know if I’m going to be able to do the house in FL. I don’t have the money to be able to go down to house hunt. I’d need about $500 more then it looks like I’m going to have. In addition, then moving costs in the summer would be about $3000, and I have no idea how to come up with that… I don’t want to give up, but it’s not looking good for my hopes and dreams…

I keep getting closer to the goal. (The goal being getting the house.) Tomorrow, I’m hoping to figure out how to pay off a good chunk of the money owed. Once that’s handled, I’ll be able to try to figure out IF I’ll be able to get a mortgage. So, I’m getting closer. One baby step at a time…

Speaking of getting closer to goals, I’ve been starting to do Life Coaching.  I’m looking for clients that are looking to find direction and (or) motivation in their life; people who aren’t afraid of being different to attain personal happiness. You can CLICK HERE to see my coaching profile page. Helping others helps me keep my focus. So, lets work together tog get you the life you’re looking for.

I’m also selling digital pictures, both what I have now as well as custom requests. If you have any ideas, message me and we can talk about it. Imasailorgirl at gmail dot com

The past couple days, I’ve really been thinking about camming, and why I’m not as “popular” as I could be. A lot of it seems to come down to me irregularity. Unlike a lot of girls who cam, I’m not able to get online everyday at the same time…

I’m a homeschooling mother who’s going to college and has anxiety disorders… I have so many things on my plate that my day to day life is unpredictable. I know some of you know this and it’s one of the things you accept and love about me, even though it sometimes keeps us from spending time together.I need to handle it all, and calm the anxiety that comes with it.

When you get frustrated, just remember that I’m not trying to avoid you, I’m just trying to take my life one step at a time as it comes to me.  You can message me at the site we chat on, or if we’ve chatted enough for you to have my email, you can email me…

Just thinking of you,

Regina

I’m going to be getting online soon to cam. I’m really hoping it will be a wonderful working day, as my family is driving me nuts, I could really use some fun company.

I’m going to need to go over all my numbers again. We had to spend a little of what I made to eat, as I haven’t gotten this past weekend’s child support yet.  I’m hoping I’m not too far behind. LOL! I just really want to get “home”. I think you all will love it. You’ll get to see little snippets of my world. I’ll get to show you pictures, cam at my new house… it’ll be so lovely. Granted, it won’t all be roses… there are hurricanes and the like, but still, I’ll take that chance to live in my own little heaven!

So, I’m working on homework. I have 4/6 done. I have two more photo sets I need to do. I’m hoping to get the other two sets done pretty soon too, as it’s due today. I did get some of the “Philadelphia Doors” project. I got about 36 of the 72 pictures I needed to get done. I still have till tomorrow night to get it done. I’m hoping I’ll be able to, but with all the snow, I;ll have to wait and see.

I also aught to be working today. I still have about $400 to make. I’m getting so close I can almost taste it.  As soon as I have it all paid off, I can sit down with my ex (who’s helping me get the mortgage), and we can shop for the mortgage. I’ll also need to get all the info for down payment assistance. Each step I take gets me one step closer to being able to have a home of my own somewhere I love.

It’s insane out there today. It’s snowing AGAIN! This year we’ve beaten the record. Philadelphia has gotten more snow this winter then in any other winter. I’m snowed in for the second time this week, (actually, I’ve been snowed in since Friday).

I have so much homework to get done. I missed an assignment last week due to the snow, so I have that looming over my head as well as all the assignments I have for this week. Granted it’s my last full week of this class, so I won’t be doing this much more. I think that adds to the pressure of the work I have to do this week. Next week I start my next class, “College Math”. I’m not sure how I feel about it yet. It’s been soooo long since I had a math class!

I know some of you are following my ongoing quest to find a house. I’m continuing to get closer. Every dollar I make or is donated this month is going towards it. I’m about $400 away from this month’s minimum. Once I have that handled, I’ll be able to shop for a mortgage and down-payment assistance. Once that’s in place, I’ll have the “go ahead” to shop for a house. I’ve found a few of them I like, I’m just waiting till I have the pre-approval to contact any one, as I don’t want to invest a lot of energy into a house I might not be able to get. I know I’ve said it before, and not gotten a reaction, but if anyone wants to contribute, you can click on the beer mug and it will take you to paypal to donate. Or if you would rather, you can visit me on CamContacts. (I’m looking for how to add the online/offline button again.)

I’m also thinking of starting to video blog… what do you think?

Ok, I don’t really want it to keep snowing. LOL! But if it is, then so be it.
I’ve already told my professor that I won’t be able to do today’s assignment due to the snow, (I have to be able to get out into the city to do it). Today, I’m going to try to relax a little, though I really should be working! I took the last two days off working due to circumstances, (Friday I was ill, and Saturday I was crying most of the day).

Yeah, I’m $60 behind…

Today I went out and shot a few pictures of one of my girls. I think they went wonderfully. I’m going to try shooting my other daughter within the next few days.

Speaking of such things, when I was out doing my homework on Saturday, I was asked about shooting a boudoir photoshoot. It should be interesting it’s going to be my very first one. Other then photojournalistic style shooting, I’ve not shot adults. I’ve never “posed” anyone.

I also need to really sit down with a pen and paper and get my priorities straight. I’ve had other people to depend on for so long. I need to really get straight what it is that I want to do; where I want to be; who I want to be; what I would like in my life. And to be ok with what ever I choose.
I know some of that may sound odd, but it’s true…

I’m so flustered. I had this site crash, now I’m going to need to re-do it. Plus, I have a ton of school work and I’ve fallen behind with getting my bills paid off, I’m back to where I was when I started. I think I need a miracle to do it now. I’m trying to remember that if I can keep myself together enough, I’ll be able to do it. It’s not really as big as I’m making it out to be. I need to make about $550 in about 13 days. I know I’ve made it before, but I had a room to be able to do it in, and didn’t have schoolwork that needed to be done.

*calm….. calm*

Ok, trying to calm my nerves. I have one way that I can make $200 of it. It may take most of a day, though. I can shoot the set for IShotMyself (ISM). That would be good, and would bring it down to $350. Plus, if my account doesn’t fo into deficit, I think I’ll have another $40 going into it($310). I think I should be able to make at least $50 at myfreecams (MFC) over the next week and a half ($290). (I don’t make too much money there, it’s one of the places where the guys will hang out, but I’ll rarely get any money for it.) So, if I can do all that, $290 isn’t too much. LOL! I know I won’t be able to work tomorrow night (night before my younger daughter’s birthday), or on her birthday… so that leaves me with 11 days counting today minus the one for doing the ISM; averages needing to make about $29 a day.not including MFC.

Thank you for listening to my venting… I’m just trying to get it straight in my head that everything will be ok.
I have a timeline in front of me and I’m panicking about it a bit. You see, (if you don’t already know), I’m trying to get into a house. The $8000 (or 10%) tax rebate’s been extended till May, so I’m trying to make it so I have the money together to be able to do it! I’m hoping to be able to use the tax rebate as the down payment! … Which means, I only have about 3 months to get all my ducks in a row and get papers signed for it. (The preliminary paperwork has to be signed by May 1st, and it has to close by July 1st) So, I’m trying to move on it all before it goes away, and feel like I’m the only one who IS doing anything towards it!

…sigh…